“I often see people on the streets dressed as objects and handing out leaflets. I tend to avoid leaflets, but it breaks my heart to see a grown man dressed as a taco. So, if there’s a costume involved, I tend not only to accept the leaflet, but to accept it graciously, saying ‘Thank you so much,’ and thinking, ‘You poor, pathetic son of a bitch.’” From The Santaland Diaries by David Sedaris, adapted by Joe Mantello.

The Santaland Diaries returns to Shake Rag Alley tonight, with Sam Murn reprising his role as Crumpet, the grumpy Macy’s elf. Come ye adults and listen to Crumpet explain the sad facts of elfdom with a deadpan expression and a potty mouth. If you like sugar-coated, holiday cheer, this is not the performance for you. Crumpet is no George Bailey. Come to think of it, George Bailey had a bit of an attitude. But he wasn’t funny about it, the way Crumpet is.

The point is this, if you like to laugh and appreciate a bad attitude, then leave your kids at home, and come down to Shake Rag Alley’s Quonset Hut (formerly the Napa Auto) at 411 Commerce Street, for some adult humor. (Don’t worry, Crumpet keeps his clothes on.)

The show is tonight only, November 15, 2014. The performance begins at 7:30 p.m. and is preceded by a social hour, and viewing of the Art Lottery pieces. For $20 you can enjoy the event, social hour, and the performance. Your $20 ticket will not include participation in the Art Lottery, which is sold out, but you are welcome to stay and view the fun! Call the Shake Rag office at 608-987-3292 for tickets.

– Contributed by the Hays